Doll Curious

Mattel's Baby Brother Tender Love
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Growing up in a house filled with females, the best way a girl could educate herself about male anatomy was to find a friend who owned Baby Brother Tender Love.  A glance at our Great Dane Khan's undercarriage just didn't cut it.  Our neighbors had the same problem.  They were a family of three sisters, and I was best friends with Lori and Nancy.  But between us couldn't locate a single peer who had access to Baby Brother.

When news hit that a local department store received a shipment of the anatomically correct male baby doll, we made a date after school to visit the merchant.  

We found Baby Brother Tender Love on a top shelf in a dark corner of the toy section.  The box showed a young girl with a creepy grin fondling the doll as she bathed him.  Her hand strategically covered the parts we had come to see.  "We're going to have to take him out of the box," I directed.  

As soon as we pulled the box down we were approached by management.  "Is there something I can help you girls with?" the dour matron inquired.

Usually in these situations we could count on Nancy to drum up a good story but she froze in the face of elderly authority.  Shy Lori had already escaped to the Garanimals aisle, so she was no help.  Thinking quickly, I spat out a fantastic lie, "We need to find a present for our friend's birthday."

"Well you girls need to find a present in a different aisle.  You cannot buy this doll without your parents' permission."

I suppose we must have known what a controversy Baby Brother was causing among prudes everywhere.  It was the 70s.  There was fear that Free Love and drugs might trickle into Small Town Minnesota at any second, and these penis dolls were a sure sign of the coming revolution.


stephaniesays said…
this doll creeps me out.
patrice said…
naw, he's harmless and EDUCATIONAL :)
frimp said…
You'd find out soon enough...

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